November 1st
ACCEPTING WHAT IS
“Don’t seek for everything to happen as you wish it would, but rather wish that everything happens as it actually will—then your life will flow well.”
—EPICTETUS, ENCHIRIDION, 8
“It is easy to praise providence for anything that may happen if you have two qualities: a complete view of what has actually happened in each instance and a sense of gratitude. Without gratitude what is the point of seeing, and without seeing what is the object of gratitude?”
—EPICTETUS, DISCOURSES, 1.6.1–2
Something happened that we wish had not. Which of these is easiest to change: our opinion or the event that is past?
The answer is obvious. Accept what happened and change your wish that it had not happened. Stoicism calls this the “art of acquiescence”—to accept rather than fight every little thing.
And the most practiced Stoics take it a step further. Instead of simply accepting what happens, they urge us to actually enjoy what has happened—whatever it is. Nietzsche, many centuries later, coined the perfect expression to capture this idea: amor fati (a love of fate). It’s not just accepting, it’s loving everything that happens.
To wish for what has happened to happen is a clever way to avoid disappointment because nothing is contrary to your desires. But to actually feel gratitude for what happens? To love it? That’s a recipe for happiness and joy.
11月1日
接纳现实
“不要企求万事都如你所愿，而应希望一切都如其实际发生的那样发生。如此，你的人生便会顺遂。”
——爱比克泰德，《手册》，第8节
“倘若具备两种品质，便不难赞颂命运对一切遭遇的安排：其一，能够完整地认识每件事情的真实经过；其二，心怀感恩。没有感恩，洞察又有何意义？而没有洞察，感恩又何所寄托？”
——爱比克泰德，《论说集》，1.6.1–2
有些事情已经发生，而我们宁愿它们从未发生。在我们的看法与已经过去的事实之间，究竟哪一个更容易改变？
答案不言自明。接纳已经发生的事实，改变自己希望它不曾发生的念头。斯多葛哲学将此称为“顺受的艺术”——与其事事抗争，不如学会接纳。
而那些真正深谙斯多葛之道的人，还会更进一步。他们不仅主张接受发生的一切，更倡导我们由衷地欣然面对一切遭遇，无论其为何事。数百年后，尼采创造了一个恰如其分的表达：amor fati，即“热爱命运”。这不仅意味着接受一切，更意味着热爱所发生的一切。
希望已经发生的事情恰如其所发生，本是一种避免失望的智慧，因为如此一来，便没有什么会违背你的意愿。然而，倘若你不仅能够接受一切，还能对一切心怀感激，甚至由衷热爱，那便真正找到了通往幸福与喜悦的道路。
读要读顺口，写要写顺手， 擒字如擒虎，解句如解题。 |