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I met my now best friend Laura years ago during my first visit to Helsinki. Without any acquaintances in the city, I just wanted someone to sit next to in public, and given our tenuous work connection, she fitted the bill. Our drink quickly turned into dinner, wrapping up four hours later after doing deep dives on politics, religion, sex and life, the kind of topics that usually take friends years to address. A year later, I flew back to be a bridesmaid at her wedding, still shocked at how fast we forged a connection.
几年前第一次去赫尔辛基时，我遇到了我现在最好的朋友劳拉。我在这座城市没有熟人，只希望能有个人在外与我同坐。考虑到我和劳拉在工作上有些许联系，她就成为了合适之选。我们的关系从一起喝酒迅速进化为共进晚餐。餐桌上，我们进行了四小时关于政治、宗教、性和生活的深入交谈，这些话题一般只有相交多年的朋友才会谈起。一年后，我又飞回赫尔辛基，作为伴娘参加劳拉的婚礼，并依然对我们迅速建立起的友谊感到不可思议。
She told me matter-of-factly when I asked why we had bonded so quickly, “The Finnish don’t believe in talking bullshit.”
当我问起为什么我们会这么快就成为朋友，她实事求是地告诉我：“芬兰人不相信说废话。”
✚ 配图均为芬兰漫画《芬兰人的噩梦》插图
What she neglected to tell me, however, is that Finns think if there’s no important topic to discuss, there’s no conversation at all. In fact, one of their national sayings is ‘Silence is gold, talking is silver’.
但她并没有告诉我，如果芬兰人认为没有重要的话题，他们就不会进行任何交流。事实上，芬兰有一句俗话：“沉默是金，多言为银。”
Small talk outside social situations between close friends is virtually non-existent. If you’re a foreigner, congratulations – you’re probably the loudest person on their often (voluntarily) silent public transport.
社交场合之外，密友间的闲聊几乎是不存在的。如果你是外国人，那么恭喜你，在芬兰人（自发形成的）安静的公交上，你很可能成为嗓门最大的人。
With two million saunas in the country, which are enjoyed fully nude , the Finnish seem to have no problem with getting up close and personal. But when clothes are on, the bets are off.
在芬兰,有200万间桑拿房，芬兰人似乎对全裸蒸桑拿这样的亲密接触没什么意见。可一旦他们穿上衣服，事情就另当别论了。
Finnish people often forgo the conversational niceties that are hard-baked into other cultures. As Tiina Latvala, a former English instructor explained, part of her job was to introduce her young students to the concept of small talk.
芬兰人总是放弃早已根植于其他文化中的交谈艺术。Tiina Latvala曾任英语教师，她说她的部分工作就是向年轻的学生们介绍“闲谈”的概念。
“We had a practice where you had to pretend to meet someone for the first time,” Latvala said. “You had to pretend you were meeting at the cafe or on a bus and [that] you didn’t know each other and do a bit of chit chat. They usually found it really difficult.”
Latvala说:“我们有个练习，你假装第一次遇见对方：你要装作在咖啡馆或公共车上和某个陌生人见面，然后聊上几句。”学生们通常觉得这真的很难。
Alina Jefremoff, an 18-year-old Finnish student in Helsinki, recalls similarly formatted exercises with an air of incredulity. Thanks to television and films (which are mostly broadcast in English) she was already acquainted with non-Finnish communication styles. Even still, she had to endure a series of connect-the-dot-style homework assignments.
赫尔辛基的18岁芬兰学生Alina Jefremoff回忆起类似的练习时，神情充满怀疑。由于那些(主要是用英语播放的)电视节目和电影，她已经对非芬兰的交流方式非常熟悉了。即便如此，她也不得不忍受一系列“连线”式的家庭作业。
“[They’re] about basic conversation,” she explained. “The answers are already there. We are taught to answer ‘I’m great, how about you?’; ‘How is your mum?’. It was very weird… as if there were right answers to the questions.”
她解释道：“(这些作业)是关于基本对话的，答案早就摆在那里了。我们被教导要回答‘我很好，你呢?’‘你妈妈好吗?’这太奇怪了…说得好像这些问题有标准答案一样。”
There are more hypotheses than answers for why Finnish culture has a veil of silence permanently stitched in place. Latvala believes their trademark directness has something to do with the complexity of the Finnish language and the fairly large distance between cities.
关于芬兰文化为什么总是保持沉默的现象，推测和假设多过确切答案。Latvala认为芬兰人坦率直接的特征与芬兰语的复杂性和芬兰各城市间遥远的距离有关。
However, Prof Laura Kolbe, who teaches European history at the University of Helsinki, sees the topic through a comparative lens. The Finns, she says, don’t see their quietness or lack of small talk as a negative. Instead, every culture judges another on their social norms, hence the widespread stereotype of the silent Finn among more emotive nationalities.
但赫尔辛基大学的欧洲史教授Laura Kolbe是从比较的角度看待这个问题的。她说，芬兰人不认为他们的安静和缺乏闲聊是消极的，因为每一种文化都是根据自己的社会规范来评判其他文化，所以在更加注重情感表达的国家眼中，产生了对沉默的芬兰人的刻板印象。
“The idea of silence has been especially prevalent when Finns were seen from the eyes of close neighbours,” she explained. “For example, when Swedish- and German-speaking people came to Finland, they saw Finns as silent citizens, wondering why the people didn’t speak any Swedish or German and rather remained silent among their guests.”
她解释到：“在近邻国家人们眼中，芬兰人很“沉默”的印象尤为普遍。比如，说瑞典语或德语的人来到芬兰时，会认为芬兰人是“沉默的公民”，不明白这些人为什么不讲瑞典语也不讲德语，宁愿在客人中一言不发。”
It isn’t for lack of skill, for Finland has two national languages – Finnish and Swedish – and Finns begin English lessons when they’re six or seven. But rather it’s because when faced with expressing themselves in second language, many often choose to not say anything rather than risk not being fully understood. However, when among their own, silence functions as an extension of comfortable conversation.
芬兰人保持安静并不是因为不会说这些语言。芬兰有两种官方语言——芬兰语和瑞典语，并且芬兰人6、7岁就开始学英语。但当需要用第二语言表达自己时，很多人不愿冒着被误解的风险，而选择什么都不说。而在他们自己人之间，安静就是令人舒适的谈话的延续。
It’s an idea that’s backed up by Dr Anna Vatanen, a researcher at the University of Oulu, whose forthcoming study ‘Lapses in interaction and the stereotype of the Silent Finn’ demonstrates that Finns do communicate through comfortable silence – particularly among familiars. When it comes to outsiders judging the stereotypically straightforward Finn, she warns that some nuances do get lost in translation.
奥卢大学研究员Anna Vatanen博士的研究证实了这一观点。她的研究“对芬兰人的成见——缺乏互动和总是沉默”即将发表，这篇文章表明，芬兰人确实通过令人舒适的沉默来交流，在熟人间这种情况更甚。当外界评判芬兰人时，他们保持着芬兰人简单坦率的成见，Vatanen指出这样的成见使芬兰人的安静被微妙地曲解了。
“It’s not about the structure or features of the language, but rather the ways in which people use the language to do things,” she explained. “For instance, the ‘how are you?’ question that is most often placed in the very beginning of an encounter. In English-speaking countries, it is mostly used just as a greeting and no serious answer is expected to it.On the contrary, the Finnish counterpart can expect a ‘real’ answer after it.”
她解释说：“这跟语言的结构或是特点都没有关系，只是人们用语言行事的方式不同。比如说，当人们打招呼时，最经常用来开头的话是‘你最近怎么样？’在英语的国家，这话一般只是作为问候语，不需要很认真的回答。而芬兰人正相反，他们真的希望了解你的近况。”
But when Finns do opt out of casual conversation, says Karoliina Korhonen, author of Finnish Nightmares, a book and online comic series where an ‘average’ Finn deals with life’s most benign terrors, it also has something to do with respect. Why risk making someone else feel uncomfortable?
书籍和网络连载漫画《芬兰人的噩梦》描绘了“普通”芬兰人如何处理生活中 “最为无害的恐惧”，其作者Karoliina Korhonen说，芬兰人决定退出闲谈也与尊重有关。为什么要冒险让别人感到不适呢？
“I like to think Finnish people value personal space,” she notes. “If you don’t know another person, you don’t want to bother them. They might be having their own time or they don’t want a stranger to come bother them. If you see they’re open and you both are open, you can have something. But most of the time people are polite and keep their distance.”
“我认为芬兰人十分尊重个人空间，”她提到“如果你不认识别人，你就不会想去打扰他们。他们可能在做自己的事，或者并不想让陌生人打搅。假如你和对方都比较开放，你们就能说些什么。但大多数情况下人们总是彬彬有礼地保持距离。”
In some cases, though, Finnish society seems to be trending toward a marginally more open existence. However, it’s happening slowly. For Jussi Salonen, COO of Finnish chocolate company Goodio, living in Los Angeles for two years made him wish he could import a bit more of the US’ open spirit to his home country.
然而，在某些情况下，芬兰社会似乎正在走向一个更加开放的边缘。但是，这种情况进展得很慢。芬兰巧克力公司Goodio的首席运营官Jussi Salonen已在洛杉矶生活了两年，对他来说，他希望自己能够将美国的开放精神更多地引入祖国。
“When I was [back] in Finland, I was almost offended when I went to get a cup of coffee from a coffee shop and they didn’t say anything,” he recalled. “ I think a little bit of communication or small talk doesn’t hurt.”
“当我回到芬兰时，我去咖啡店想买杯咖啡。整个过程中店员什么也没说，我几乎感觉被冒犯了，”他回忆道。“我认为一点沟通或闲聊并不会有什么坏处。”
➤http://www.bbc.com/travel/story/20181016-how-the-finnish-survive-without-small-talk（By Laura Studarus）
✪翻译：范仪亦 张文钰 陈宁 刘可圆
✎排版：刘可圆
