遇见讨厌的事情时，我们应该怎么办？

We’ve all been through unsavory situations. Maybe it’s an acquaintance going on and on about themselves without asking you a single question about what’s up in your life. Maybe it’s your boss telling you to work overtime. Or maybe it’s a high school frenemy, bringing up some embarrassing thing you did 10 years ago—again.

我们都经历过不愉快的情况。也许是一个熟人不停地谈论自己，而对你的生活毫不关心。也许是老板告诉你要加班。也许是高中同学再次提起你十年前的一些糗事。

Difficult people and difficult situations are a fact of life, and as much as they make your teeth grind, there’s not much you can do except deal with them the best way you know how. There may be times, however, when the anger or irritation gets too overwhelming, and we end up making decisions we wish we didn’t.

讨厌的人和尴尬的情况是生活中的既定事实，尽管他们让你咬牙切齿，但除了用你知道的最好的方式处理他们之外，你无计可施。有时候，愤怒或烦躁会压倒一切，最终导致我们做出悔之晚矣的决定。

This is where self-awareness comes in. Self-awareness can be defined as “the ability to focus on yourself and how your actions, thoughts, or emotions do or don’t align with your internal standards.” In the case of difficult people or difficult situations, self-awareness can keep you from reacting in ways you might regret. And most importantly, help you achieve the ultimate enlightenment of being unbothered.

这就是自我意识的作用。自我意识可以被定义为 "关注自己的能力，以及你的行为、思想或情绪如何与你的内在标准相一致或不一致"。在遇到讨厌的人或尴尬的情况下，自我意识可以使你以不后悔的方式做出反应。最重要的是，帮助你实现不被打扰的终极目标。

According to experts, we get upset over difficult people or situations when they don’t meet our expectations. “If you try to understand why you’re hard on people, the more you will understand that you have unmet expectations of how people should treat you and what they should say to you. But if you really dig deep, you will understand that those expectations all come from yourself,” said Miguel Bermundo, a life coach from Manila.

据专家说，当讨厌的人或情况不符合我们的期望时，我们就会感到不安。"如果你试着去了解你为什么对人苛刻，你就会越发明白，你对人们应该如何对待你、应该对你说什么的期望未能得到满足。但如果你真的深入挖掘，你就会明白，这些期望都来自于你自身，"来自马尼拉的生活教练米格尔-贝蒙多说。

“Accept that people won’t always treat you the way you want or expect,” he said. “Choose who you’re going to count on for certain things.”

"人们不会总是以你想要或期望的方式对待你，接受这一点。"他说。"选择你在某些事情上靠得住的人。"

It’s easy to lose control in the heat of the moment. Maybe you came across a very rude salesperson, or got triggered by a co-worker’s comment. The best way to regain control of the situation is to check yourself before reacting.

人在关键时刻很容易失去控制。也许你遇到了一个非常粗鲁的销售人员，或者被同事的评论所激怒。重新控制局面的最好方法是在做出反应之前审查自己。

“The moment you acknowledge and identify what you’re feeling, it suddenly loses its power over you because you’re not blind to it; you see it clearly,” said Anna Manalastas, a yoga teacher, also based in Manila.

瑜伽老师安娜-马纳拉斯塔斯说："当你承认并确定你的感受时，它突然失去了对你的力量，因为你对它并不盲目；你清楚地看到了它。"

Don’t underestimate the power of a long, deep breath. Manalastas said that breathing is “the simplest, most accessible way to calm yourself down.” It’s also one of the best regulators of our emotions. When we experience fear or agitation, our breathing patterns change.

不要低估深呼吸的力量。马纳拉斯塔斯说，呼吸是 "使自己平静下来的最简单、最容易的方法"。它也是我们情绪的最佳调节器之一，当我们经历恐惧或激动时，我们的呼吸模式会发生变化。

Self-awareness is as much a practice of the body as it is of the mind. The way we feel manifests in the body, and so what we do with the body also influences how we feel.

自我意识既是对身体的训练，也是对心灵的训练。我们的感觉表现在身体上，因此我们对身体的所作所为也影响着我们的感觉。

You should recognize that you are irritated and at the same time be aware of the other embodiments of your irritation, your feet are getting restless, hands are getting fidgety.

This is why physical practices that focus on breath and movement like yoga are said to impact our self-awareness and wellbeing.

你应该认识到你被激怒了，同时意识到你被激怒的其他表现，你可能会手足无措、焦躁不安这就是为什么专注于呼吸和运动的身体训练，如瑜伽，据说会影响我们的自我意识和健康。

The physical practice reminds us that there’s a very deep and undeniable connection between your body and your mind. If you try to calm your body, you’re creating space physically [and mentally].”

身体训练提醒我们，在身体和思想之间存在着非常深刻和不可否认的联系，如果你试图让你的身体平静下来，你就会在身体上[和精神上]创造空间。

1. enlightenment n.  启迪，开导; 启蒙运动

I gained a good deal of enlightenment from him.  

我从他那里获得许多启发。

2. undeniable  adj.  不可否认的，无法抵赖的

It is undeniable that the economic picture is brightening.  

不可否认经济状况正在好转。

原文链接：

https://www.vice.com/en/article/y3ppw7/self-awareness-meditation-mental-health-emotions-anger-management

https://www.vice.com/en/article/akedjz/trauma-dumping-emotions-baggage-mindfulness-relationships